Man Raised By Modern Parents Struggling To Adjust To Human Society

Great satirical article from “The Onion” about today’s sheltered adult/children resulting from “helicopter” parents…

This is the group I lovingly refer to as SJI’s-Slack Jawed Idiots- due to their lack of social skills resulting from overly protective parents….

Here’s a brief excerpt from the article and a link to the full story:

Sullivan reportedly has trouble navigating even the most simple situations, often becoming frustrated to the point of tears by an attempt to mail a letter at the post office, or shutting down completely when forced to have a conversation with a person he doesn’t feel comfortable with.

“Whenever David enters a social gathering, for example, he quickly becomes fearful and anxious,” Reynolds said. “He’ll back himself into a corner, rapidly consume alcohol and snack foods, avoid eye contact, and, in some cases, lash out with sarcasm in reaction to perceived threats. Within an hour, he invariably becomes spooked and flees.”

When he feels especially threatened or overwhelmed, Sullivan returns to the place where he was raised, sometimes spending an entire weekend in the habitat to which he is still best adapted. According to Reynolds it is, in many ways, the only world Sullivan understands.

“David’s lack of acculturation is particularly evident when he attempts to interact with women, even in the most innocuous of circumstances,” Reynolds said. “Most likely he was fiercely protected and coddled by the female parent during his teen years instead of gradually learning to interact with girls as a normal child of that age would.”

“Sadly, David remains so off-putting to members of the opposite sex that he will probably never procreate,” Reynolds added.

via Man Raised By Parents Struggling To Adjust To Human Society | The Onion – America’s Finest News Source.