Some Thoughts from 37000 Feet

First of all, I’m amazed that I can blog from an airplane 37000 feet in the air while I’m traveling to Phoenix on a business trip.  It’s so cool to be able to access the internet in flight, but I’m so thankful they still don’t let people use cell phones.  This is as good as it gets while traveling….

I’m sitting here listening to Spencer Lewis on my iPod while I type this…I’ve flown cross-country and around the world with Spencer more times than I can count and he’s never known.  Maybe he will now.  His music makes it so easy to create my own peaceful, pleasant bubble while surrounded by travel madness.

And travel is madness now.  There is no longer anything pleasant about it.  Planes are packed solid and less comfortable than the old Greyhound Buses.  The airlines are out to get every penny they can from you any way they can.  Customer service is non-existent.

And my fellow travelers…

I frequently think of the old Noel Coward song:  “Why Do the Wrong People Travel?”

So many of them complain constantly and I don’t know why.  Sure, its miserable to travel, but why do people have to wallow in it?  Why can’t they just make the best of it and muddle through.

I will offer them a few travel pointers:

1. Never argue with the airline.  You will not win.  They do not care and you will only raise your blood pressure.
2. When your flight is delayed and you originally only had 30 minutes to make your connection, do not complain loudly to anyone and everyone within ear shot.  Yes, we realize you are going to miss your connection and we do not care.  You should never have booked a flight with a connection that tight in the first place.  We should all know better by now.  I certainly do.
3. If it is cold enough for you to think you need to wear a sweat shirt, it is too cold to wear flip-flops, so don’t complain loudly about your feet being cold.
4. If you are a man over 40, and certainly over 50, you have no excuse for wearing shorts on a plane.  No one wants to see your  legs anymore.  Where is your sense of dignity, man?
5. When you travel, you are on an airplane.  They do now have the internet, but they do not yet have gyms.  Dress accordingly.  No need to wear your workout clothes…
6. It is beyond tacky to bring a whole box of Bojangles Chicken on the plane and eat it by yourself.  Yes, someone is doing that a couple of rows behind me…

That’s it for now.  I’m going to put up the laptop and go back to listening to Spencer Lewis on my iPod with my Bose noise reduction headphones and reading my Kindle.

I’ve learned these are all necessities for my frequent travel in today’s world.  They help me pretend to be anywhere but where I am.  This is one moment I do not need to be in….

I just had to take advantage of the moment and the access to all this new technology.