Category Archives: My Journey

Lisa Birnbach’s ‘True Prep’ for Ultra-Modern Times – NY Times.com Review

Here is an excerpt from the the New York Times Review of  “True Prep” and a link to the full review:

In 1980 “The Official Preppy Handbook” arrived as a field guide to the habits of the cotillion-hopping, madras-wearing, loafer-shod upper crust. Was it a valentine, a joke or a prophecy? This much is clear: It began life as a $3.95 paperback and stayed on the New York Times best-seller list for more than a year. Copies were plentiful, yet asking prices for used ones today can easily top $100 and sometimes exceed $1,000. Somebody must think it contains useful information.

When Lisa Birnbach co-wrote and edited it, she was in some ways prescient: the J. Crew catalog wasn’t even a gleam in a marketer’s eye. But much of “The Official Preppy Handbook” just codified widely known information about high-WASP habits and affectations. (It also borrowed from “Take Ivy,” a 1965 style guide published in Japan.) Its original readers, whether they were knowing or curious, were apt to be of boarding-school age or a little older. Now they’re pushing 50.

After the handbook’s huge success Ms. Birnbach helped bring forth a wide array of less necessary titles. (Among them: “1,003 Great Things to Smile About” in 2004 and “40% Off Is the New Black” in 2009.) And the world changed — a lot. Among the post-1980 phenomena with which “The Official Preppy Handbook” could not conjure are the Internet, the McMansion, the cellphone, synthetic fleece and the emergence of famous rehab facilities as today’s new boarding schools.

So Ms. Birnbach has returned to the subject she knows best. Together with Chip Kidd, the graphic designer and writer with the certifiably preppy first name, she has come up with “True Prep: It’s a Whole New Old World,” a surprisingly worthwhile sequel to the now-creaky “Handbook.” This new compendium moves beyond school days to address matters newly relevant for the core readership: how to remarry, how to dress for a funeral and how to deal with the collateral damage caused by decades’ worth of the party-hearty behavior described in the first book.

via Books of The Times – Lisa Birnbach’s ‘True Prep’ for Ultra-Modern Times – NYTimes.com.

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True Prep

This one is mainly for my College friends.  The Washington and Lee, Sweet Briar, RMWC, Mary Baldwin, UVA and other Virginia Colleges  gang.

The rest of you, please bear with us…

If it’s any help…my partner says he would probably have hated me in College, but we’ve managed to reach a stylistic middle ground and last almost 14 years…

Lisa Birnbach was one of the authors of “The Official Preppy Handbook” back in the late 1970’s- early 1980’s.  I won’t say it was our handbook because that implies we didn’t know it all before hand.  It just happened to reflect our lives at the time.  Her new book, “True Prep”, comes out on September 7th.  It’s about Preps at Middle Age.  I’ve already pre-ordered my copy from Amazon.com.

I’m already scared….How many cliches can I be at one time?  I’m already seen as a middle aged Guppy and now I realize I’m still a middle aged Preppie.  From what I have read of this book so far, I’m totally still a prep.  Just because I have at least a half dozen pair of Cole Haan Loafers and my weekend wardrobe is totally J Crew.  Everything else is Brooks Brothers or Ralph Lauren.  It hurts to face the truth….

You can take the boy out of W&L, but you can’t take the W&L out of the boy…

Here is the video that defines our generation’s new place in Society:

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Chapter 18: Drinking Again | My Southern Gothic Life

New post up on my other blog.  Here is an excerpt and a link to the full post:

There are three predominant themes to life in the South:  Sex, Religion and Drinking.  I’ve touched on each of these subjects and will do so more on the future.

For now, let’s concentrate on drinking.

That seems to be the through line in my posts so far.  We spend a lot of time thinking about alcohol in The South.  And, if we are honest, we spend a lot of time drinking in The South–or talking about why we don’t.  Or those who do…

Southern culture, as I know it, is built on hypocrisy.  We were trained at an early age to play a role and hide it if we deviated from the role.  This always lead to conspicuous alcohol consumption.

Therefore, we spent a lot of time focusing on these areas of thought about drinking:

Drinking too much

Lying about drinking too much

Lying about not drinking

Hiding from our neighbors that we were drinking.

It was both a very simple and very complicated situation.

via Chapter 18: Drinking Again | My Southern Gothic Life.

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Chapter 17: The Gym | My Southern Gothic Life

New post up on my other blog:

I am now a gym rat.  I know several people who read this blog and have known me since childhood have already fainted.  Please pick yourselves up off the floor and work with me…

I will readily admit, until I was in my late 40′s, I did everything I could to avoid the gym.  It was the source of too many bad memories of “not belonging” and being inadequate as a conventional guy.

I was always intellectually competitive, but I missed the physically competitive gene.

via Chapter 17: The Gym | My Southern Gothic Life.

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It’s Friday. How about “Talking About A Revolution”?

I heard this driving into work today and it seemed like a good way to start- and end- a Friday.

A little Tracy Chapman.  I can’t believe this song is 22 years old.

And we haven’t had the Revolution yet!

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Chapter 16: Losing My Religion | My Southern Gothic Life

I have a new post up on my other blog.  Here is the opening and a link to the full post:

I can pinpoint the exact moment when I lost my religion.  Or at least my patience with organized religion.

Growing up, we were Social Baptist.  That means we went to Church, like most people did back then, as kind of club.  It was just something one did.  You didn’t really think too much about it.  We thought that was for the best…

Religion, or the beliefs part, was viewed as a private journey.  It was considered tacky and intrusive to talk about it too much in public.  One went to Church to socialize, hear a sermon meant to make you think on your own, and then went on with the week.

via Chapter 16: Losing My Religion | My Southern Gothic Life.

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My Southern Gothic Life | Chapter 15: Pretty Women

New post on my other blog:

I am a Southern Gentleman.  I can’t help it.  It’s who I am genetically, who I was raised to be and, simply, who I am.

That means, I put women on a pedestal.  I can’t help it.  I was raised to view them as these ethereal, superior creatures that I am here to protect and serve.

I was never taught to view them as less than me, but still, I know the feminist, justifiably, have issues with men like me.

Put me in social contact with the biggest motorcycle dyke, with a shaved head and tattoos, I’ll still open the door for her.  I can’t help it.

Here is a link to the full blog:

via My Southern Gothic Life | Trying to Stay Sane in a Crazy Southern World….

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We Are Family

After a very long day….I just felt like a little Sister Sledge to move me to a more positive place.

Here’s to family:  By birth, god help us, by marriage or by choice…

Family is a very broad term.  There are so many kinds of families…

Frustrating and maddening as they may sometimes be, I still want to celebrate them.

Surviving it, finding it, creating it….whatever…it all deserves to be recognized for its importance in our lives.

And I just felt like hearing Sister Sledge…

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Chapter 12: The Original Breakfast Club | My Southern Gothic Life

New post up on my other blog.

Here is an excerpt and the link to the full post:

As I think back, I realize my High School friends and I were the Original Breakfast Club.  You know, like the John Hughes movie in the 1980′s.    Except our bonds were by choice, not forced by Detention…

We all also seemed to be ahead of our time in a couple of ways.  First, we formed a “family” by choice, not by birth, and we pioneered the “group dating” that seems to be the “new normal” for kids today.

Back then, 35 years ago, we were just strange.  Our so we liked to think that’s how people saw us.  Who knows where the truth lies after so many years?

via Chapter 12: The Original Breakfast Club | My Southern Gothic Life.

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Daddy’s Dying, Who’s Got the Bourbon? | My Southern Gothic Life

New Post up on my other blog:  MySouthernGothicLife.com.  Here is an excerpt with a link to the full post:

My Father died in the early 1980′s when he was about 54 years old.  Technically, the cause of death was cancer.  I always told people that, after more than 30 years with my Mother, I strongly suspected he really just really wanted some peace and quiet.

See, my Mother truly believed in “till death do you part.”  She even had some questions for our Pastor about if, perhaps, the marriage bonds extended into the afterlife.  I could never figure out if she was concerned with avoiding the effort of finding a new husband in Heaven or just trying to hang on to my Father forever.  Literally.

via Daddy’s Dying, Who’s Got the Bourbon? | My Southern Gothic Life.

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